Things You Didn't Do
by ichirukifan101
Summary: Nanao, dear Nanao-chan, do you remember? The day you became my fukutaicho, chasing me around to do paperwork, the kido corps transfer? The day I realized I loved you? Do you remember? Can you remember? Will you remember?


**Author's Note: Wow…two uploaded fanfics in one day..I'm quite proud of myself!~ Yet another free prose style, slightly angsty poem about, of course, our beloved Shunsui and Nanao. It's probably a tad bit AU, because I had Nanao just suddenly come into the fukutaicho position, instead of her staying in the squads, and Lisa Yadomaru isn't mentioned…So I hope none of you guys really care about the change. My apologies if it's annoying. Plus, I had a lot of random events tossed in here, like the chasing around with paperwork (although, I think that does actually happen…), and the kido corps transfer offer thing (but I think that it could have definitely happened), because it fit in with the poem. Plus, there's not a whole lotta stuff on these people, okay? So I added them in. Please, read and enjoy!~**

**Disclaimer: I do not own Bleach. If I did, Shunsui and Nanao would have definitely been a couple (or at least eventually), and Hisana wouldn't have died.**

* * *

><p><strong>Things You Didn't Do<strong>

Nanao,

My beloved Nanao-chan,

Do you remember that very first day,

That fateful moment,

When I met you?

.

I was drunk that day,

As I usually am,

And you were being introduced

As my new fukutaicho.

.

I waltzed into the meeting room.

Late by ten minutes,

Drunk off my mind,

And tried to flirt with you.

.

I thought that you'd just turn down the offer,

The promotion of becoming fukutaicho of the eighth,

Shocked at seeing the sight

Of such a disgraceful captain.

.

But you didn't.

.

You cringed slightly,

Looked abashed

And disgraced

And humiliated,

Wanting to be anywhere in the world,

But here,

But you stayed.

.

And for that,

I'm glad.

.

Do you remember,

Merely a week after your promotion,

You,

Chasing me furiously around the Sereitei?

You were trying to get me to work,

Complete that day's paperwork,

As you so often are.

.

And of course,

Like always,

I ran off.

.

Unlike the others,

You followed.

.

I thought that you would have stayed behind,

Stared in disbelief

At my disappearance,

Sighed in resentment,

And worked on the forms.

.

But you didn't.

.

No,

Instead,

You chased me around the Sereitei,

Determined as anything else

To get me to actually work

On those dreaded papers,

And trapped me in a kido spell-

I had never realized you were _that_ good, before-

To make me sign those sheets.

.

That was the day

That I truly knew,

Knew and noticed,

That you were different.

.

And Nanao,

Do you remember that day,

The day we were out on a mission,

Our first one in fact,

And you had almost gotten killed?

.

You were surrounded by hollows,

Simply overpowered,

And I would have helped you,

But I was on the other side of the battlefield.

.

Too late to do anything,

But rush in,

Moments too late,

And watch,

Helplessly,

As you were about to be killed.

.

Or so I thought.

.

Instead,

On pure instinct,

I saw you conjure up a barrier.

Golden, sheer,

And immensely powerful.

.

Barrier kido #99,

In fact.

.

_On pure instinct_.

.

Nothing else.

.

Of course,

In our mission report,

We had to mention it.

.

And of course,

The kido corps saw,

And immediately asked your permission

To transfer.

.

I thought you'd leave

Without a second glance.

.

But you didn't.

.

It was clear-

To me,

At least-

That you did not approve of me.

.

You hated that I was always drunk,

Hated that I was a lazy slob,

Hated the slovenly mess

That I would always leave behind in my wake.

.

I knew,

Too,

That the corps would have been better for you,

A place for you to grow,

And learn,

And achieve far more

Than you ever could here.

.

I wouldn't have enjoyed

Watching you leave,

But it was for the better.

.

I would have expected it.

.

Instead,

You stayed.

.

Politely turned down their offer,

And stated quite clearly,

That you were not going anywhere.

.

And I had never been happier.

.

And remember that day,

For of course you do,

When you had followed us,

Without even a rational thought,

To fight against Yama-jii?

.

It was a suicide mission,

Ukitake and me

Had already known,

That it was going to be a pointless battle.

.

He could overpower all of the captains,

Every single one of us,

Without even trying.

.

And if two of the most seasoned captains,

Two of the oldest,

Two of the most powerful,

Two of the most experienced,

Couldn't even lay a scratch on him,

What chance did you,

A mere fukutaicho,

Have?

.

None.

.

But either way,

You had followed.

.

Ran right along with us

Down the cliff edge,

Followed behind

With not a second of assessment.

.

With nothing,

It seemed,

With loyalty to your taichou

To cling onto.

.

And you felt the brunt of his power-

No,

That wasn't even close to all of it.

.

That was merely a smidgen of his true strength,

And still,

You collapsed,

A look of utter fear on your features,

Sweat beading on your forehead,

Slumped on the ground,

But head still held high.

I though you would have died.

.

But you didn't.

.

And for that,

I am eternally grateful.

.

I managed to take you in my arms,

Shunpo as far away as I could,

Far from the danger,

As far as I could manage-

And set you down on the grass.

.

Before coming right back

To the midst of the incoming battle.

.

Of course,

You would never know

How that expression haunted me,

That look of pure fear,

That expression of utter helplessness,

That kept me tossing and turning

Well into the hours of the night.

.

What would I have done if you had died,

I wonder?

.

Probably live life,

Follow the same routine as I usually do,

Avoid paperwork,

Get drunk-

But it would be different,

Somehow,

Without you there.

.

It'd feel…

Empty.

* * *

><p>And,<p>

Over the years,

Since that day you became my vice captain,

To the days leading up

To the fated,

And unavoidable,

Winter War,

We grew closer.

.

Out trust in each other increased,

Fought back to back,

Always together,

Trusting each other with our lives,

The best of friends,

Closer than siblings.

.

No one else

Could say to have that close of a connection

With their second in command.

No one.

* * *

><p>And then came the day,<p>

That awful,

Tortuous day,

When you had to go and fight

In the Winter War.

.

You were needed in the front lines,

To help command the ranks,

Strong because of your kido prowess-

And I,

Still recovering in the Sereitei

From the wounds dealt to me in battle,

Couldn't go with you,

Couldn't be by your side,

Couldn't help you survive.

.

You were on your own now,

And I hoped,

Hoped fervently,

That you would come back to me

Safe and happy.

.

That was the day,

I realized that I loved you.

.

That day,

That moment,

Was definitely the best one in my long life.

.

Nothing else could compare.

.

I loved you,

Would die for you,

Would do anything and everything

To be by your side,

And to keep you at mine.

.

And so,

I waited joyously,

A happy man,

For you to return from the Winter War,

When I would tell you

That I truly loved you,

And would do anything

To win your heart.

.

So I waited,

As the years dragged by,

As I healed from my injuries,

As I envisioned confessing my love to you,

And you returning my feelings.

.

And there were so many things to apologize for,

So many things to say sorry to,

So many changes I was going to make,

So many things that I was going to say,

After you returned from the Winter War.

.

You didn't.

* * *

><p><strong>Author's Note: PLEASE DON'T HURT ME! *runs from angry mob* I'm sorry…I wrote this up really fast, like in about…thirty-so minutes, so sorry if it feels too rushed, and for any grammar mistakes that may have been spotted. Too impatient to get a beta…hehehe…I actually wrote another poem in this style, withe the "things you didn't do", theme, but it was set in a real-world setting, between a brother and a sister relationship type of thing. No incest! Just a sibling relationship.<strong>

**I hope that you enjoyed the story, and, if you have the time, please drop a review!~ And if you leave a flame (I'll be honest, I'm kinda expecting them), it's safe to use your actual username. I won't track you down and send you a private message rant or anything. **

**Thank you for reading!~ Reviews are loved!~**


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